


A Shared Secret

by thatonefandomwriter



Category: Hellsing
Genre: Comfort/Angst, F/M, Forbidden Love, Its only a little bit of comfort, Mutual Pining, My First Work in This Fandom, Please dont judge me on the spelling mistakes in the tags, Pre Cannon, SO SORRY, Someone says the love word, Telepathic Bond, a whole lot of i know thay you love me and i cant do anything about it, alucard cant decide if he wants to be a dick or not, and its sorta sad, i get excited talking about my bad stories okay, ive been told this was pretty sad, master/servant relationship, that might just be me being bad at characterization tho lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 06:51:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21249215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatonefandomwriter/pseuds/thatonefandomwriter
Summary: He knew she hated to show affection towards him, she feared what a relationship like this would do not to Integra, but to Sir Integra Hellsing.Integra couldn't know that he felt the same about her. It was less of a temptation for her if she thought he didn't love her back.





	A Shared Secret

He was the Hellsing organization's ace in the hole, their trump card. He was a trained assassin of his own kind, and he loved it. Alucard was the whispers of the demons that kept his victims up at night, a writhing shadow of evil with piercing crimson eyes. He would commit atrocity after atrocity with a smile on his face. He was a monster, and he never wanted anyone- or anything- to forget that fact. Yet, the No Life King stood in the middle of the large office as he was scolded like a child. The ghostings of his usual grin still on the corners of his lips, despite the way that Integra yelled and berated him for his irresponsible behavior. He had gotten preoccupied during a mission, going after a vampire that had decided to run and abandoned the post where he was supposed to keep watch, ghouls swarmed the area that Hellsing officers sat the second the vampire had vanished. He couldn't resist a game of cat and mouse, and by god was the mouse finicky that round. Still, he won with a bullet between the mouse's eyes. Despite his foolish actions, he had come back in time to aid in the fight and keep the organization from permanently losing any soldiers. 

"Eight officers injured! You could have put our entire mission at risk and every single soldier who was with you! Is your attention span that short that you couldn't stay at your post?!" Integra roared, her hands slamming on her desk for emphasis. She glared at him through her glasses, her gaze slicing through the vampire. Alucard's head tilted to the side slightly, he could hear her in his mind saying something else. Her thoughts nearly screaming in his skull with her heightened emotions. 

_You could have gotten hurt. I could have lost you. _

He didn't comment on the thoughts he could hear as they raced through her mind and to his, or the fact that her emotions swelled inside his own chest. Her anxiety and anger, and something close to a four letter word they wouldn't dare utter in front of each other. 

"Well? What do you have to say for yourself?" Integra finally asked, she had finally regained her composure and her voice held it's usual steely tone. 

Alucard was yanked back to the world with her harsh tone, rendering him speechless for half a second. Then, his face split into its usual grin and he bowed with a flourish, his hair snaking every which way it wanted around his sharp features. "Master, I am deeply sorry for my behavior. I should have waited for your order, but you understand my nature." He purred, peeking up at her through his tinted glasses. He saw the way her anger hesitantly melted at his apology and his grin widened. Her shoulders relaxed, but her eyes remained hard on him, fighting a war with her emotions. He straightened himself once more, standing at full attention in the middle of the expansive office, his hand over his still heart in apology. "I am a predator, after all. I was created to hunt. It is both a blessing and a curse." He watched her with a curious gaze as she slowly moved from her desk until she stood directly in front of him. He still towered over his master, but with one look he would bow to her. One command and he would do what she wanted. 

Integra reached out a hand and gently smoothed some of his hair from his face, tucking the wisps of shadows that Alucard called his hair back behind his ear with a softer look on her face. She watched as he reached up and took off his wide brimmed hat and glasses alike, the objects disappearing from his hands and then reappearing on her desk in a neat pile. She wouldn't admit it, but she knew he was taking off the mask now. That this was Alucard in a more raw sense, and it made something in her chest twist. "What am I to do with you?" She asked, her voice wary but fondness in her eyes. Her hand slowly moved to trace a finger from his ear then along the length of his jaw. She lowered her eyes away from him when her hand no longer made contact with his icy skin. 

"Are you looking to punish me? Or is this in a more general sense?" Came Alucard's melodic voice, his grin audible. He knew she hated to show affection towards him, she feared what a relationship like this would do not to Integra, but to Sir Integra Hellsing. What true fondness towards the enemy would say about her morals. What it would say if she abandoned the sacred vows she took and ran into the awaiting arms of a vampire. What would the others in the organization say about it? They already looked down upon her for being a woman, for her age, for her unconventional tactics. She couldn't handle another blow against her. No, she couldn't show affection towards him. It was a tactical choice to not show him love, even though it shredded her to pieces when she thought about it at night. He knew, of course. How could he not? They had a psychic bond that ran deep, he could hear her every thought and feel her every emotion in his silent chest. He saw her dreams, only turning away if they became too intense, he was still a gentleman, after all. She, on the other hand, did not get the same treatment, she was not allowed inside his head. 

Integra couldn't know that he felt the same about her. It was less of a temptation for her if she thought he acted like this with all his masters before, if she thought he didn't love her back. If she held the belief that he was a heartless monster. If she didn't know that he would do anything for her.

"Master." Came his voice again, his smile losing its teasing edge, his voice becoming softer. 

Integra kept both her hands to her sides, her eyes avoiding his as if it were the last thing she would do. "What?" 

"Get out of your head." Alucard whispered to her. He reached up and gently took her glasses off of her face. "It's late for you humans. You should rest." He added, holding out his gloved hand for her to take. She hesitated a moment, then grasped it tightly. He lead her from her office to her bedroom down the expansive hall, when they reached her room he placed her glasses on one of the bedside tables and allowed her to sit on the bed. He immediately dropped to his knees in front of her, placing the bottom of her foot against his thigh and beginning to unlace the heavy military boot. 

"What are you doing?" Integra's voice held the sharp edge of a warning, but she hadn't moved away yet. She reached up and slowly began to undo her suit jacket and laid it onto the bed to the right of her. There was mistrust written into the lines of her face, but she didn't do anything else. She made the rules, she could tell him to leave at any moment. One of her eyebrows quirked up, she was curious to what his excuse was this time. It wasn't the first time he tried to get into her bed, and she was sure it wouldn't be the last. 

Alucard's head dropped and his smile turned devilish, one of his hands snaking up to gently grip on her upper calf while the other stayed at her ankle. "Just aiding you in getting undressed for bed, my master. Is that not allowed?" He asked, peeking up at her through the mess of ebony hair. He watched the way her cheeks turned scarlet and she yanked her foot back, immediately posing it to kick him in the face instead. He didn't move his hands away from her yet, the thumb on her calf running soft circles as he waited for her next move. He had been shot, impaled, beheaded, and far worse. What was a kick to his face?

"No that is not allowed! Get out of my room this instant! You have overstayed your welcome in my presence!" Integra yelled, opting to kick him in the shoulder with enough force that, if he were human, it would break the bone under her foot. Her face heated up further at the sound of his laughter, then he vanished from her sight. Bastard. She yanked her leg up onto the bed and undid her shoes with fever, muttering angrily to herself the entire time she did. When her shoes were off she spent barely any time at all getting undressed and into a silk pajama set before shoving herself under the covers of her bed. Her face was still hot and her blood still boiled. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift away after she was certain he was no longer near. In her state between awake and asleep she could have sworn she felt the phantom of icy lips brush against her lips and the tickle of hair across her cheek. She would bet money she felt a gloved hand gently brush the long hair from her face. 

"Goodnight, my master. I love you." A low voice whispered, then the sensations disappeared and she drifted to sleep properly. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed this. Please let me know how you felt about it!


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